Outside Dog

I've known this for a while now.  Everyone on the Trail is searching for... something.  Or someone.  Or Someone.  So many people have so much pain, and when you are all stuck in a shelter or hostel in close quarters with nothing better to do than shoot the breeze, those questions start coming out.  I mean, most of us spend all day hiking by ourselves with nothing but our own thoughts to accompany us.  And then when we do find human interaction, the veneer of triviality can sometimes be worn down.

Most people are just looking to be understood.  They are looking for a place to belong.  They are looking for a home.  Maybe I'm just projecting my own longings on every other person on the Trail, but I don't think so.  We all seem to be people who don't quite fit in elsewhere so we look to the Trail.  Of course, the truth is that we would fit in if we just trusted ourselves and accepted ourselves with all our faults.  But we don't.  So we remain guarded.  And those walls keep us from fitting in.

I'm going to be getting ahead on the Trail from someone I've been hiking with for a few days now.  I see so much potential in him and in so many of the rest of these folks who seem to have given up on themselves or on others in some way.  Outside Dog was given that name early on in the Trail.  A girl gave him that name because she said "You're an outside dog.  You don't have a home."

The sad thing... he believed it and has taken it as his identity.  And that makes him sad.  Even though he just keeps fighting very hard to be who he really is... which is a very kind, hard working person.

I've been encouraging him to find a different Trail name since him not having a home is merely a circumstance, not an identity.  And since I have to hike my own hike, and not his, it's a sad goodbye since he'll have to stay in town an extra few days.  I hope to see him up on the Trail.  And my prayer is that somehow, God would show him that he really does have a home.  He may be an outside dog because being indoors would be stifling, but he does belong and he has a home.  If he could just accept it for himself.

If you're of the praying ilk, please pray that God would comfort the hearts of some of the people I've met out here (for lots of varying reasons they are hurt).  The ones I'm especially thinking of are Grin, Snail, Outside Dog, and Shady.  There are so many others but they are ones I've gotten to really talk with and know their stories.  Thanks.